Awards done. Newies start. Comes now “Greta.” Thriller killer diller. Suspense. Spooky. Psychological. Itty bitty gritty.
Nice little girl — Chloë Grace Moretz — returns a lost purse to a not nice older lady — Isabelle Huppert. Its director Neil Jordan won an Oscar for “The Crying Game.” His brown coat, gray pants, tieless shirt and shloompy scarf won’t win a costume award.
Jordan: “How I created this script? I’m a writer. If inspiration fails, you just write. Every day, all day. Mornings, evenings, whichever on whatever. Computer. Notebooks. I go to sleep writing. Most is rubbish. Trick is to know what’s rubbish. I rewrote this to make it scarier.”
“Sometimes you don’t even get to eat. I used to smoke. Now I have the vape. Then suddenly somebody tells you ‘yes,’ and that person is suddenly a producer.”
Where’s his Oscar?
“On my mantelpiece in Ireland. The gold’s coming off it.”
With off-Broadway’s “The Mother” starting previews, Huppert did not show.
Beautiful Moretz did. Her short skirt barely covered the eyebrows. A graduate of spooky films starting with “The Amityville Horror,” she said: “When Neil brought me this script, I loved it and immediately put myself in the part, although I didn’t know Isabelle. I changed my look to play a young woman who recently lost her mother. In it I grow close to this eccentric lonely piano teacher and then things go way off.”
“Shooting here was great. My dog and I lived here two years. I love New York.”
Grey wants to fiddle all over
Tony winner Joel Grey’s Yiddish “Fiddler on the Roof” — so good it rates four bagels — opened a 16-week run at Theater Row’s Stage 42 a k a the Little Shubert. No Broadway house available, or it could’ve grabbed Best Revival of a Musical. All theaters are booked. Old, historic, nobody wants to build another. Three shades of Grey showed: daughter Jennifer, grandchild Stella and Joel remembered his dad, klezmer star Mickey Katz. They toasted in the engraved Tiffany Champagne glasses he gave his “George M!” cast in 1968. The show’s headed for Chicago and LA. Joel: “I want it to play Berlin.”
OK, Listen Up
Jonah Hill: “Kids have pinups on their walls. I had Martin Scorsese.” . . . INNER Circle’s annual politico spoof, on April 27, is titled “Off the Rails.” . . . PALM Beach airport. Arbiter of style Simon Doonan in white jeans pushing a silver wheely, heading — well, naturally, back to NYC . . . SCARLET Lady, Virgin’s new 2020 ship, will have two resident tattoo artists onboard. And passenger Bruce Littlefield . . . MASTER Tin-Sun, who brought feng shui to the Times Square and Columbus Circle redo, got honored at Carnegie Hall’s Year of the Pig gala.
‘Hair’ raising
It’s Black History Month, so a Minneapolis theater revived rock’s ’60’s hippie, sexy, druggy, anti-Vietnam, anti-flag, bohemian Age of Aquarius, racially integrated musical “Hair,” which has starred Heather MacRae and Diane Keaton. James Fragale’s beautiful black contract singer, Melba Moore, was first to go nude onstage. It’s famous. They’re famous. And Fragale’s new book is called “Breakthroughs.”
Dems dither
DIM Dems have Elizabeth Warren, whom her tribe calls Little Feather, Burbling Biden, who puts his foot in whatever he steps in and last time out lost badly, and Baloney Sanders who’s full of his first name.
And who honeymooned where? Florida? No. Too sunny. Paris? No. Too far. Bahamas? No. Too near. Niagara Falls? No. Too wet. The Soviet Union? Our country’s doing good.
Watching “Mission: Impossible Six” a guy said: “Tom Cruise’s real mission? To figure out the plot of ‘Mission: Impossible ONE.’ ”
Only in New York, kids, only in New York.